Me: How was Sluggie when you left him?
D: Sluggie wasn't doing good. He stopped moving. He was suffering. I didn't want him to suffer anymore.
Me: What happened?
D: I squished him so he could be happy and go to heaven to see God.
Me: Really? Wow (I'm pretty much stunned).
D: He'll be much happier now.
Note to self: Delaney is going to end world suffering...one slug at a time.
It's late afternoon and I'm on the computer checking my email. The girls are playing in Delaney's room. It's peaceful. It's calm. This makes me happy. Suddenly, I hear a bloody murder scream which I only hear when someone has injured herself. Before I can even get up and make my way down the hall, in comes one screaming kid and her big sister who is attempting to talk over the screaming.
Me: What happened?
D: Well, she scratched my back.
H: My head huuuuuuurts! Waaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.....
D: And I scratched her on the back too! She started it! (Her lip is quivering and I can see fresh sobs about to break through at any minute).
Me: Delaney, she's holding her head. Did you hit her on the head?
D: (Pauses, clearly thinking it through). Yes. But she scratched my back and it hurt really bad.
Me: Delaney go to your room. We do not hit our sister and we certainly do NOT lie.
H: My head hurts momma!
Me: Did you scratch your sister on the back?
H: I wanted to.
Me: You go to your room too. We do not hit our sister.
H: No momma! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Me: Yes Hadley. Go sit in your room and I'll come get you when it's time to come out.
While both girls were sobbing in their rooms, I took advantage of the quiet downstairs and started dinner. Smirking all the while because life can be so funny sometimes. I love that Delaney finally has had enough of being a doormat and decided to fight back. I love that Hadley just got plain annoyed with her big sister and decided to retaliate. I guess this is the stage we have reached. To drive home my point, I subtracted one marble from each girl's jar.